I just watched him fix the children lunch. He proceeded to play a math lesson with my daughter. Yesterday the fair. Tomorrow a four day vacation with his immediate family on the beach. Moving in together. Looking and talking about places. Is this REALLY happening?? 15 months from being parked in the yard. Initiating that first kiss. I feel something new. It’s a little exciting-scary. Like a smile that terrifies you because it feels so good.
I had finally let go of the cottage. Only small pains of homesickness came but passed quick enough that I didn’t fall to tears. I had also resolved that I wouldn’t find another place to live before winter. Fine enough. One winter in a dark cellar apartment. Cheap expenses. Save money. Fine. Then a call came about a 3 bedroom place with a yard, garage, and two bathrooms. Sure, I’ll look at it. Maybe. Well, like with most everything I see I quickly fell in love. I talked to the owner all day yesterday. I had the money ready. The kids were excited. It was close to their school. Set back in the woods. It even had a swing set. We’ve never had one of those before. Things were looking up.
Then I get an email. The house sold. Just like that. I’m so tired of living like this. I want better for my children. They deserve it.